Masochist

thorny_rose_by_Dektol1l

There are whole supermarket sections dedicated to fighting the natural process of aging. It is an industry worth billions with more research being funded than that for the eradication of HIV.  What used to be a sign of wisdom and clarity is now a feature drowned in animal fat and chemicals or chopped off, sucked out and tightened, because it is ugly. We have whole supermarket sections standing as proud proclamations of a natural process deemed to be ugly, and no one seems to think it is insane.

In the 21st century we have moulded our technology to communicate with us. We know when our laundry, dishes or food is ready by the familiar beep every appliance carries. Our phone’s melancholic sound of doom alerts that our life is almost over when the battery is almost dead. Our technology is smart because it communicates with us and we respond making life easier. The human body also carries this characteristic. When energy is needed our stomachs play the sound of hunger. We feel thirst and fatigue and respond tending to what our body needs to survive. The body is equipped with a multitude of mechanisms to communicate with us a better survival, of which the most important is pain. Over eating, drinking, and sleeping hurt as much as under eating, drinking, and sleeping. When it comes to our physical state, pain is a teacher of being. The only other entity effecting our state of existence in this way, is ego. Very simply put, the ego is the body of thoughts, impressions, conclusions and reactions formed in response to the conditioning of a respective culture. It begins to form as soon as the personality and at one point becomes it. Just like thirst and fatigue the ego is an appendage of the mind that exists to protect. If we were all completely spiritual beings we wouldn’t care about this life because it is only a phase, it is our ego that allows us to identify and enjoy the materialism of our world. It is necessary for the appreciation of what this life has to offer because without it this life becomes meaningless, a void. Over identification with the ego, just like over eating, is painful. In fact, pain is almost always experienced from the ego since psychological pain is felt much more frequently than physical pain. When the materialism of this world is what is identified as happiness it is painful when naturally, just like aging, it is taken away.

The ego knows only the joys of this world because it is the product of it but we have forgotten that we are ego and soul and spirit. Things decay but the happiness they bring is eternal because appreciation comes from the soul, and is an act of worshipping the spirit. When I worship myself I am co-creator of my world. In my appreciation I am expanding the depths of my soul. I am only in pain when I am opposing a divine communication meant as a natural lesson of my existence. The death of the ego is in its acceptance. I embrace that which cuts deeper than the sharpest of knives because if I am to know my true nature I must be dissected. I am of love. I am of peace. I am of abundance, just like you. I have been insane waging war on the changes of my being, but now I am a masochist in love with every teaching. Amen.

One thought on “Masochist

  1. This is really thoughtful; sort of reminds me of Schopenhauer on death––with some differences: Schopenhauer was just a pessimist, lacking your exuberance for life.

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